Brucey Springsteen

At the moment, I would safely say I have a lot of free time on my hands. I think it's even worse to have all this free time, as well as the added disadvantage of being unemployed. Somehow, being paid whilst hardly working is better than hardly working and getting pay...if that made any grammatical sense. Yes, it's the money that makes all the difference.

The annoying thing about the way I spend my free-time is that I spend a lot my nights wrapped in a doona and poncho (damn Dubai air-conditioning) infront of the computer. I think i've watched every episode of Robot Chicken twice. I was even going to park myself infront of another screen - the television - and watch The Royal Tenenbaums for the upteenth time, (it's just one of those films that I always see on television....that, and Mrs Doubtfire...and in the case of Star World here, Freaky Friday...??!) but I told myself that surely there is something more productive to be done than staring at a variety of different screens.

Anyways, being a veteran of wiling away all my free-time, I decided to make a list (cause lists are also awesome) of new hobbies that I invented for myself in my free time, hobbies that miraculously didn't involve staring at some kind of screen

- Glue-gun stuff together
Ah yes, ever since I stole my trusty glue-gun from a guy in my old dorm ages ago, it has kept me amused on long, dreary nights. I have embellished a whole lot of things with a whole lot of crap. bottlecap pencil holders...bubble-wrap roses...sushi soy-sauce holders (in the shape of fish) necklaces...however, with all it's impressiveness, it would still not hold my shoes together after a hard night of partying....sigh. Seriously, a glue-gun is a highly worthy investment

- Stick Stuff on Your Walls
I can't remember the countless times i've been told that my room is too 'cluttered with posters' and 'haphazard with blu-tack', and even my mother stating ' all these paper posters are a fire hazard. You will burn to death in your sleep'....however, I feel none of you have any idea how engaging and engrossing a task it really is! it's not just a matter of slapping anything on your walls foolheartedly! everything takes planning! will the post-it note i wrote two years ago fit with the Strokes tour poster and the Prince of Wales coaster? will the yellow Maximo Park ticket sit well next to my old school Hatebreed ticket? what if someone finds out about my past Lord of the Rings obsession? it's all a product of careful planning, re-thinking, and possibly a great deal of insecurity issues....

- Download new music to listen to and then get a head start on framing your future jugdments about them
Why do you think I know so much? I prep by downloading a lot of 'new hip music' in my free time, and sit there and think 'eeeeeeew' most of the time. Arab Strap? New Young Pony Club? Rejected! Also, I tend to write angry tirades, and make up new genres for my amusement. Example:

The Grates - Bullshit.
New Young Pony Club - Pile of Shit
Female Singers - Big Heaping Pile of Bullshit
Belle and Sebastian - Boring Bullshit But Not Quite The Same Genre Of Shit As Female Singers

- Clean your keyboard
Oh man. If you love picking your ears and digging through your bellybutton, this this is absolute heaven (yes now people will know im really disgusting). Because I lack the proper tools to properly clean my laptop's keyboard - I use the next best thing - my nail file, and my ear pick (yes I own an ear pick...doesn't everyone?). Ahhhh, the satisfying feeling of pulling the biggest amount of lint, fingernail, and grains of rice from being your F8 key. Bliss.

- Make Lists
.....well.

- Go through your mother's closet and try on/steal all her vintage clothes
Only applicable if you live with your mother...who hoards stuff. And also usually works best if you are a girl. Although I hear the granny cardigan is very popular with skinny, girl-jeans wearing boys these days

It's just as stated in About A Boy. Units of times. If you can really allocate enough units to enough useless tasks, you'll find yourself onto the next day in no time. Although I do warn you to keep note that in amongst those scheduled units of time, you may be labelled as 'a person of too much free time' or 'a person who has nothing better to do' or 'not reaching goals', or even 'bizarre'. But hold strong my friends - it's the units, not the mental draws of life, that are all you really need to fill up your time.

The Wrong Trousers.

I wouldn't say that my life was particularly terrible....

Although honestly, I do say it all the time. I do tend to put a lot of people off with my gripes, as I find it hard to determine the fine line between 'hardship' and 'plain old pessimism'.

Anyways, the truth is that I don't like a lot of things about life. What's even worse, is that I fancy myself something of a fantastical writer of sorts. I suppose this blog might eventually be a testament to that, because at some stage I do wish to be an established blogger at some stage in my life. I want to be the username that is being uttered on the streets. The page that is bookmarked by strangers. The page that has an audience that will read and proclaim 'why that's exactly what I thought the other day.'

The yuppies networking.
The panic.

What I really dispise most about Dubai, and especially about my house, is the ridiculous air-condition that one has to subject to. It may be 37 degrees outside, but inside i'm wrapped infront of the computer with my doona and a poncho. There is a war going on in our family...no one can maintain the temperature they want for more than half an hour...it's freezing right now. When I got back here from Melbourne (read...no air-conditioning in my scummy, yet highly missed sharehouse), I was insanely sick with a burning fever and complete air-conditioning delirium. I don't think i've breathed in a real cold breeze for a while.

I've been reading a lot of Clem Bastow blog entries on The Age website. There was a lot of backlash within my social circles against her, I think the exact term used for her by a close friend of mine was 'that fucking bitch knows shit about crap'. I must admit, her entries are mildly amusing, but they're not rocket science. Her reviews on the streetpress could do with a new angle, besides using the "LOLZZ make fun of xxEmOxx web culturezzz!" template over and over again.

The problem with blogging is that suddenly now everyone wants to be good at something. You can get a whole variety of stupid job titles from blogs...you can tell most of them are made up, and you get this overall impression that there is some desperation these people have to pawn off their social misgivings and thoughts, to have them validated by the public. In short, most people that blog are more than likely to be nothing more than awkward, misplaced humans that need to justifiy themselves.

You really can't give stupidity a webpage anymore.

Although it is very entertaining.